What I Ate For Lunch and Why

And now I guess it’s just going to be totally normal to eat my yogurt with the edge of tiny plastic knife.

So I’ve become the kind of person who brings her laptop everywhere, even to her office, so I can type things up as I go. Which meant I had it with me so I could skype with M. while eating my sandwich and yogurt before class. While of course we had big dramatic things to talk about–I mean, she might have a j-o-b by the end of the week!–of equal importance was whether I should eat my yogurt with a tiny plastic fork or a tiny plastic knife, having no spoons in my drawer at all. I was inclined to the fork, but M. suggested the knife, and, well, she’s the one with the Ph.D. Worked wonders when it came to scooping around the edges.

Leaned back in my chair, gazed up into the fluorescent light tubes in the ceiling of my cloffice, took a minute between wall-to-wall meetings and classes from 10am to 5pm to down a sandwich and listen to this song, remember when we stood up swaying at Giants stadium to this one, whole place singing that chorus I was dying it was so beautiful, in the family and friends section because somebody L. knows knows somebody who’s married to somebody or something? I totally get why L. moved to Cleveland and support the following of dreams even if they take a person from Brooklyn to Cleveland, but man, I miss those times sometimes.

I ate and attended to the calendar. I think it’s almost done. There are things I’m not proud of, classes that end just when others begin, librarians teaching for three hours in a row, more happening at night than I’d prefer. But what can I say, it’s a complicated if mostly boring puzzle, some bleeding edges are to be expected.

I swallowed my lunch in the half hour between whatever it was I was working on, either assessing the assessment reports or getting the appointments up on the calendar, and the rubric workshop. I’d forgotten to put my yogurt in the refrigerator so asked one of my social networks if they thought I should eat it anyway and what followed was much lollery. Most cheerful part of my entire day.

Unsung hero of many a last second lunch, that ol PB&J! A tough day in terms of feelings, it was pretty great to tuck into something so reliable. Plus a yogurt, but that was really more for show, trying to make like I brought enough food for an adult.

It has been by almost any measure a really tough semester. Too much work, too many feelings, too sick, sick for a month. And then here I am on the Saturday shift, a nine hour nonstop extravaganza helping students format APA headers, get started on their papers about behavior, learn contemporary Western academic library noise norms. I should hate it. But as I stood behind the counter bolting my food and watching this wild snowstorm swirl against the wall of windows, the low chattering hum of group work, remembering some fine afternoons last winter and wondering what fine afternoons are on their way, this feeling of presiding for a day over something worthwhile, well, how could I be ungrateful?

I ate my sadsack sack lunch from home and waited patiently for the clock to turn over to my appointment with my primary care physician. I’m pretty sure she’ll tell me rest and fluids and more rest and fluids, but I decided this morning to go ahead and let her tell me that on the off chance she says something like take this yellow pill twice a day.

In the absence of a pan of lasagna, I ate my peanut butter and jelly sandwich and my cup of yogurt in my cloffice, getting ready for the rest of this remarkably long day. October, man! You are kicking my ass and it’s only the 3rd!